MEDIA: Seven Sharp vs. The Project


Alarmingly, the Fed said on Friday morning that it had acted too late to avoid a hard landing and that 75 points was back on the agenda just as Orr is about to make his decision impacting stocks. 60% of Kiwis resetting their mortgages this year as inflation soars, the stock market slumps, Putin’s war increasingly points to a tactical nuke on the battlefield while Ukrainian wheat prices rise poised to cause mass starvation as conflict erupts around a planet that is burning fast and in danger of collapse.

So I decided to tune into the strongholds of 7pm news in New Zealand, Seven Sharp and The projectto see how the big and good of the 7 p.m. news navigated among the circled swarms of black swans.

Now I have to tell you everything that I never watch Seven Sharp or The project because I’m a basic reading age, don’t consider ZM entertainment or The Edge and I have an internet connection, but a lot of our population goes online at 7 p.m. to worship the altars of light infotainment and I thought I’d pick the Friday episodes to rewatch so I could see what the masses are thinking.

I wonder what the masses are thinking.

Seven Sharp is in place. We all love Hills and Jeremy. He’s still making faces in private schools and she’s still doling out burns on Twitter, so I look forward to their thoughts on Ukrainian wheat prices and the existential malaise of late-stage capitalism.

I must have been disappointed.

The first story was about how cold winter feels this year.

I am not joking.

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There is a question about the future without talking about the future.

The climate crisis and its catastrophic impacts are not mentioned. Fingers are apparently crossed for a good ski season.

Then there is a story about punctuation.

I am not joking.

A full shutdown is now seen as passive aggressive micro-aggression against easily triggered millennials.

Damn, shoot me in the mouth now.

Then there is a discussion of the most used emojis.

I am not joking.

War, Famine, Pestilence and Death, the four horsemen of the Apocalypse roam the geopolitical horizon and Seven Sharp talk about how to use emoticons without coming across as passive-aggressive.

I never prayed for a napalm attack like I did while watching this.

Hills is embarrassed to use uncool emojis.

Women’s rugby is the next story and we all have to love women’s rugby even if we don’t give a damn about men’s rugby.

The poor kids on Stewart Island were all asked if they knew the name of the women’s rugby team and none of them did, which helped you as a viewer appreciate the sound of everything that taxpayers money to send a TVNZ team and the whole PR women’s rugby team. to a school on the farthest island who didn’t know who they were gurgling down as you gasp at the unbelievable cost of a Seven Sharp third story.

How’s the gold-plated budget for this tasteless watery mediocrity?

The following story is about a rescue club that needs salt from the local community to roll up its sleeves and help rebuild it blah blah blah. No mention of it being climate change destroying the coastline and this surf club, oh no, just salt of the earth local community to roll up their sleeves and help rebuild it blah blah blah.

Then there is a cat contest.

Again, I wish Christ I was kidding, but no, there’s a cat completion.

So winter is cold while ignoring the climate crisis, full shutdowns trigger millennials, no one on Stewart Island knew the name of the women’s rugby team that came to visit, the surf club must be rebuilt despite the climate crisis eroding the coast and a competing cat, is the vast horizon of the incurious intellectuals as defended by the state broadcaster?


OK, The project now.

How is it more horrible than Seven Sharp?

I recognize Auckland’s 37th funniest comedian Jeremy Corbett, poor Wallace Chapman, Jesse Mulliga and, I have no idea who the other two are.

How many hosts does this show have?

The main story is an inmate who has bright school lights shining in his cabin.

How is there a live audience for this?

Who Christ takes over and says, “You know what, I’d love to watch the most boring, mundane current affairs show in the country, thank you.”

There’s an infomercial from Dancing with the Stars and an interview with some pop stars.

This is The Edge with footage if it was set in Australia, not Melbourne Australia, more Tasmania Australia.

It’s like on The projectthe planet is not burning, there is no suffering, and willful ignorance is a pleasant numbness.

Watching The project it’s like being asphyxiated, a creeping void that you give in to.

It’s as if both shows are relevant for patients in comas, the elderly, Christian families, and people with fetal alcohol syndrome.

I had no idea it was honestly that stupid.

I think I understand why the debate is so childish in this country.

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